When you exchanged vows with your partner, you promised to stay together through thick and thin. No matter how wonderful things are with your spouse now, every marriage faces bumps in the road. What counts is how you address those issues as they come along, and it makes it a lot easier to weather the storm when you have built a strong foundation of trust, communication, and love. This process doesn’t happen all at once, but is built brick by brick each day by how you choose to prioritize your spouse and marriage. This doesn’t mean that you have to bring your partner roses everyday or spend your money on elaborate gifts; there are very simple ways to make your partner feel appreciated and strengthen the bond you have. Best of all, you don’t have to wait to start this process; there are certain small things you can do that make a big difference in your marriage.
Say Thank You
It can be easy to brush off the things your partner does for you as just part of their “job” as your spouse, but it’s important to show them gratitude for the little ways they make your life better. Regardless of whether it is something as small as remembering to pick up milk at the store, or something bigger like supporting you while you pursue higher education, always thank your partner for the way they contribute to your shared life.
Relive the Past
When you first met your partner, you were completely enchanted. Every date was incredible, and every little gesture got you excited about the future. But now you have been together for a while, and you’re in a routine. Those cute little romantic gestures you used to do have simply fallen by the wayside. Brush off the dust and try one again now. Whether you use to bake for them, leave them sweet notes, surprise them with a special date, or send them flowers for no reason, remember why you were together in the first place with a gesture that brings back fond memories of your courtship.
Work Out Together
It’s typical for couples to gain a little weight after being married for a while. After all, who are you trying to impress? You locked it down! While you may worry less about what you look like naked in front of your spouse, it is still in the best interest of your health and the health of your marriage to find an exercise you like to do together. Whether it’s swimming, a workout class, tennis, or hitting the batting cages, finding an active way to spend time together is a great way to support each other in being healthy while deepening your bond.
Show Some PDA
This doesn’t mean that you need to make out with your partner in front of everyone at your sister’s wedding, but don’t fear showing your affection for your spouse in public. Holding hands, smiling at them, putting your arm around them, or a well-placed and sincere compliment lets your partner know you care about them, and you aren’t afraid to show it. Most importantly, always treat your spouse with respect in front of others and refrain from hurtful teasing.
Let Go of the Little Things
You may hate how your spouse leaves dirty dishes in the sink sometimes, or keeps forgetting to put their laundry in the hamper. However, holding onto these little resentments is detrimental to the health of your marriage. Accept that your partner is a real person who has flaws. They can’t always get it right, just like you. If this isn’t enough to let these small things go, take some time each week to talk about it. If you have an official discussion about it this often, chances are, the issue will not be as frequent, and if it is, you have the opportunity to calmly discuss it when you aren’t in the heat of the moment.
Cuddle in the Morning
Maybe you and your partner are used to snuggling up at the end of a long day, but chances are, you probably don’t take the time to do the same in the morning. You might be short on time, but just taking an extra five minutes in the morning to physically connect with your spouse is a great way to start your day and deepen your marriage. You don’t even need to talk; just set your alarm a little early and when it goes off, enjoy enveloping the love of your life in your arms.
At Counseling Services of Parker, we understand that sometimes, marital problems run deeper than you can handle on your own. If you are having difficulty communicating with your spouse, you may benefit from marriage counseling. We have experienced therapists who can help you with couples therapy. Contact us today to schedule an appointment.
